apropos of nothing in particular
Sometimes I wonder if I’m measuring my professional success on an entirely different scale than most of the people in my equivalent role. When I have that thought, I have to remind myself about HEWD experience, where I actually felt like I might be ahead of the curve in something…
…for once in my life. […]
Sometimes I wonder if I’m measuring my professional success on an entirely different scale than most of the people in my equivalent role. When I have that thought, I have to remind myself about HEWD experience, where I actually felt like I might be ahead of the curve in something…
…for once in my life. I think maybe that’s the psychological barrier I’m struggling against. As long as I can remember, I’ve been behind everyone else in being hip, knowing the trends, seeing what’s coming. I’ve known lots of people who are snobs about their hobbies or fandom, because they were into it before it was cool.
This is the first time ever that I’ve been “into it before it was cool” –where _it_ in this case is (a) web standards, (b) css, and (c) blogging. And it was gratifying to realize it at HEWD: been there, done that. 
But sometimes I look around and it doesn’t seem like that’s anywhere, like it’s even a thing that others strive towards. Sigh.
Being “into it before it was cool” is highly overrated. I’ve been “into it before it was cool” most of my life. I was into punk rock before it was cool. I got onto the net before it was cool. I met my wife online before it was cool. Etc. ad infinitum. All it gets you is a sense of satisfaction with one’s self. It has no practical impact. Before it gets cool, all you get are quizzical glances from people if you mention it. After it gets cool, what you get are “oh really? that’s nice. but I hold the pursestrings, so let’s do it my way.” No matter that “my way” is something that’s been discredited seven ways from Sunday, that you’ve tried it and it’s been an abysmal failure and that you know that it doesn’t work from hard-won experience.
No, being “into it before it was cool” doesn’t win you a damned thing.
well isn’t *that* optimistic!
which I suppose suits the mood I was in.
although it’s nice to know that my personal insecurity doesn’t mean anything anyway….
I’m sorry, Elaine. I guess I was just in a pissy mid-life crisis kind of mood, and your post just hit at a kind of “missing the moorings” mood I’ve been in lately and a general dissatisfaction with work. I apologize for venting in your space; I’ve got my own perfect good space to vent in….
eh. I was in a bit of “pissy mid-life crisis” headspace myself (a little early, I guess), so you were right in my zone.
I liked Shelley’s take, though.
My advice, transform it into a mid-life circus.